The "timing belt job from hell"

I've borrowed the title of this post from the YouTuber and mechanic whose channel is called "Ratchets and Wrenches."

In the 21 years I've owned first one, and then two Audi models with the vaunted and sometimes vexing 2.7T engine, I've thought about replacing the timing belt myself for a long time. The rather complex procedure had been too daunting until recently, but I can now say I've successfully done it on my 2004 allroad ("Allie"), and the job lives up to its moniker.

I figure I saved at least $1,200-$1,500 in labor by doing this myself, and I have now basically "paid off" the Quickjacks that I bought a few months ago, and which made this procedure so much easier and safer. However, as always, gaining the experience and know-how is far more valuable to me.

Technical Difficulty. Audi clearly did not engineer the 2.7T engine with serviceability in mind, although it's not quite as bad as the 4.2 bi-turbo V8 in the C5 RS6. Therefore, replacing the timing belt requires removing a lot of parts, starting with the bumper, headlights, "lock carrier," radiator fan, accessory/serpentine belt (which also gets replaced), a bunch of rollers, tensioners, and pulleys, etc. etc.

The technical complexity is overshadowed by the stress of knowing that if the crankshaft and camshafts are not kept perfectly aligned throughout the process and if the timing belt is not installed correctly, the consequences could be pretty catastrophic. To wit, bent valves in the cylinders could result.

To that end, I studied two sets of instructions and four YouTube videos on this procedure before proceeding.

Keeping My Ducks (Parts) In a Row. Being organized helps in such an involved procedure. One trick I learned from "Ratchets and Wrenches" is to sequentially line up each part that is removed. When reinstalling, just put everything back in reverse order. For good measure, I placed my parts in boxes to ensure they wouldn't get lost or out of order:

To keep screws and bolts that I removed from being lost and forgetting where they came from, I grouped them together and placed them in scrunched-up paper and labeled them:

Small Hands. During one of the 2016 GOP presidential primary debates, the size of the candidates' hands (and perhaps other body parts) somehow came up. Well, to paraphrase Marco Rubio, you know what they say about people with small hands? They have an easier time working on cars.

I've never been self-conscious about the size of my hands, but having small hands definitely comes in handy (see what I did there?) when you have to squeeze them into tight spaces. Here, my small hands helped me reach the crankshaft locking pin port in the nether regions of my car's engine block:

Being Well-Equipped. As a segue from small hands, I now have a fairly ample collection of tools and other odds and ends as a seasoned DIYer. This is essential for a procedure like this. For example, my WEN rotary tool with flex shaft proved to be unexpectedly useful in grinding away the hardened silicone that was left on after I removed the water pump for replacement with a new pump:

(The WEN rotary tool is an absolute steal, BTW. At ~ $20, it's a fraction of the cost of a comparable Dremel-brand rotary tool.)

A large heavy-duty garden staple that I had on hand also was quite useful in keeping the radiator fan viscous clutch in place while I loosened the threaded collar securing the fan:

I was also glad to be able to put to use again the 3-jaw puller that I bought for my front axle inner CV-boot repair, this time for pulling the sprockets off of the camshafts:

Of course, having a full complement of wrenches, torque wrenches, wrench sockets, and hex and Torx bits also is a must.

Concluding Thoughts and Postscript. After about a week of work on-and-off, I had successfully gotten the new timing belt on:

Being rather pleased with how everything went, I started putting the front end together and filling the coolant. But the Audi gods had other plans. Coolant started seeping out of the fins at the bottom of the radiator, and I discovered I needed a new radiator. <Sigh.>

The upside is that: (1) I discovered the leaking radiator while the front end was already off, so that saved a bit of work for me; and (2) Allie now has a spiffy new radiator, which should help her run better:

However, while I was under the car, I noticed that the rear propshaft seal on the transmission was leaking. So now I'm waiting for parts to arrive so I can address that issue. The fun never stops.

At least for now, she runs like a champ.